Productivity Tips for Single Moms Working From Home with Kids
If you are anything like me, you have Googled this topic and haven’t found much for single moms. What I did find was from moms who worked from home while their kids were at school, had support i.e. babysitters or family help, or had opted to homeschool their kids so they knew what they were up against. Thanks to the novel coronavirus, a lot of working single moms like myself have transitioned to working from home without any direction and unlike most couples, do not have support at home. You find yourself trying to navigate the new normal of assisting your kids with at home learning (notice I didn’t say homeschool) while trying to work your normal eight hour shift, or sometimes more. If you have multiple kids, my heart goes out to you even more than those of us with just one. I can only imagine what you are going through. However, let us all just take a moment to thank God that we still have jobs in this time where so many people have been furloughed or may not have a job to go back to when this is over.
My daughter and I have been social distancing and quarantined at home for over four weeks now. The first week was a bust. The school was late with getting their distance learning materials together and I had no clue that we’d be in this for the long haul so I just let her do her thing. Well, I’m happy to say that I’ve finally found out the keys to being productive (even if that means my child is going to bed at midnight some nights). So I am here to help you. I know a lot of moms are struggling with this and trust me - I have my days but these are the things that help me get things done and ultimately maximize my productivity:
Create a schedule - This is a major key. I know you have heard this before and some people may say that you do not need one but when you are a single mom and parenting alone, this truly helps. It provides structure and gives you guidance for your day. It also helps with eliminating distractions. You know that saying about failing to plan is planning to fail? I believe that. I like to use Google calendar to block my time and sync it with iCal. This works with Android phones also. I know you are probably wondering… Well, what should I include in my schedule Kim? I believe you should schedule “me” time - whatever that looks like (for me it’s devotion/journaling, prayer, and exercise), your work day, times the kids will complete their school work, meals, snacks, breaks, social time, bath time, etc. This also helps your kid to stay on track if they are old enough to read. You may be thinking, Kim this is too much for me. I get it. I shared my schedule to show you what I do but remember this: your schedule may not look like mines and mines may not look like yours. It’s okay. A schedule is not set in stone and you can adjust as necessary. Warning: It also may not go as planned everyday. Do what’s best for you. Moreover, your at home schedule is not meant to mirror the child’s school schedule, okay?
I recorded a podcast with some educator moms about working from home, parenting and teaching. You can click here to listen for more insight on schedules, routines, and more. There is a lot of helpful advice in this episode.
If you are interested to see some other examples of schedules that the educator moms shared, click here.
Have a designated space to work - mine is in the corner of my bedroom by a window. It’s nothing fancy at all. I just have a place to put my computer and office essentials where I can work by a window with some sunlight. I didn’t have this in my little cubicle in the hospital so I’m enjoying my view. Once you have a designated place, your kids will know that when you are sitting at your desk, you are working plus you can shut your door, if you need to. You can even put up a sign if you need to. However, for some of you, your bedroom may not be the best place because you are tempted to lay in bed.
Get dressed in the morning. You may think it doesn’t help but it really makes a difference. I typically work out first thing in the morning so I shower afterwards, moisturize my skin, and put on clothes, even if it’s a long tee, a comfy tee shirt dress (love these!), or some kind of loungewear (leggings, joggers, you get it). Get out of those PJs mama.
Adjust your working hours if you can. This will help to maximize your productivity. I can clock in as early as 6AM if I need to and begin working while my daughter is sleeping and if she goes to bed at 11PM, she stays sleep until around 10AM or later. I just choose to begin work at 7AM. If you have a set work schedule and you don’t currently have this flexibility, have a conversation with your boss. You never know what your options are, unless you ask.
Communicate with your kids about their work and expectations. My daughter’s teacher provides a weekly at-home learning schedule that includes assignments and it helps. I like to look it over the night before to see if there is anything I need to print out or supplement. If you are not that mom or your child’s teacher is not providing anything, it’s okay. Do what you can. Just make sure it’s something. Also, do not be afraid to reach out to the teacher for advice or help. Most of them have designated hours for assisting parents and students. One of the educator moms mentioned that you cannot go wrong with having your kids do some form of math and reading daily. At this point, you just want your kids to learn something and not just sit around idle-minded. Discussing the schedule with them helps improve communication and you can even allow them to help you create it (for those of you with older kids). My daughter has Siri setting timers for her on her iPad and I love it.
Allow your kids to have social time. Virtual playdates have helped me out a lot in getting things done. My daughter has done Group FaceTime with some girls from school and used Google Duo with family. They play games, show off their dolls, dance, and have fashion shows. It comes in handy with you have stuff to do, your chatty child wants to talk, and you are the only person he or she has to talk to.
Take regular breaks. I know you may want to sit and work for hours on end but studies have shown that taking regular breaks increase productivity. Think about it. Most companies offer two 15-minute breaks for employees that work at least eight hours in addition to their lunch breaks. Working for hours on end nonstop can contribute to stress and exhaustion. You can use breaks to get up and move (I wear an Apple Watch and it encourages me to stand and move every hour for a minimum of 12 hours per day so I do my best to meet my stand goal), exercise, take a power nap (if you will actually get back up), get on social media (because you should not be scrolling for hours - it’s the ultimate time stealer), have your snacks and meals (I know a lot of us are used to working lunches and snacks but I encourage you to try not working while you eat), and more.
Have quiet time alone. Oh my gosh. I cannot stress this enough although I’m still working on being consistent with one. My daughter will try to come in my room whispering. Haha. This allows you time to settle down after looking at your computer screen all day and assisting them with their work. Trust me, it does wonders, even if it’s only 10-30 minutes of silence. You are allowed to gather yourself, regroup, and get ready to enjoy spending time with them during the evening instead of longing for alone time.
Communicate with your coworkers and your boss. This helps you to check in with the team for accountability. We use Microsoft Teams and I love it. We have weekly meetings with our director via video and my coworkers and I touch bases daily at some point. Let them know if there is something you are struggling with due to having your kids at home or technology issues. Do not be ashamed.
Meal prep. This saves so much time during the week. I used to try to prep for Monday-Thursday but now I am at prepping on Sunday for Monday - Wednesday and prepping on Wednesday night for Thursday - Saturday. This really takes consistency and practice. Do not attempt to meal prep, fail, and give up. Just keep trying. I am a working progress myself. Some weeks I do great. Other weeks, I’ve found myself cooking lunch during working hours. If you need to order takeout or pop in a frozen pizza because you just do not feel like cooking one day, that is totally fine and it’s your business. Just make sure you are filling your body with things it can use as fuel and help with increasing your energy levels. Balance, okay? Protein, veggies, fruits, grains, good carbs and minimal bad carbs and wine. Hahaha. Seriously though, you get where I am going with this. Now, if you are constantly feeling tired, it could be what you are putting in your body. I feel energized most days up until 9-10PM.
Get active. I know you are probably reading this saying you do not have time to be active but listen, I know you can find a minimum of 30 minutes in your day to do some sort of exercise. I KNOW YOU CAN. I get up and find a YouTube workout to do so there is no excuse for you. I make space in my little apartment living room and I know that you can make space wherever you are too. You can use YouTube, walk outside, jump rope, join a live workout on Facebook or Instagram … the options are endless. This can also help with your energy levels. Shoot for three days a week and gradually work your way up to five days a week, 30 minutes a day. Some weeks will be better than others. Don’t worry about that. Just focus on getting started and not quitting.
Check in with your mom friends. We are all going through this trial of working from home, parenting, and teaching whether single, married, or in a relationship. If you do not have any mom friends, reach out to moms you have been following on social media. You will be surprised how many people will actually respond. Attend our Sunday Single Mom Chats on Instagram Live at 8:30PM CST. We typically do our weekly check-ins and answer questions that are submitted from other moms. I look forward to them every week myself. I always meet new moms from around the world. Sometimes, hearing about what other moms are doing to stay productive gives you that boost you needed.
Appreciate the time with your kids. I know for many of us, we have lived very busy lives on the go, commuting to work, making sure the kids get to extracurricular activities, and rushing home to have dinner and help our kids with their homework to do it over and over again each day. Then using the weekend to catch up on things that didn’t get done during the week. So again, count your blessings and enjoy this time even if this pandemic has only given you an extra hour or two. Give yourself lots of grace, forgiveness, and try not to stress. We are all in this together, figuring it out. If you listen to the podcast I mentioned earlier, you will be reminded that a lot of learning takes place by just living life. Your kids learn by example. Parenting and guiding your kids to model self-discipline and focus will be a major key during this time.
Bonus: If you are having seriously difficulty with being productive, managing it all, and/or experiencing anxiety or depression, know that it is okay. You are human and other people have experienced these things too. I want you to understand something. The first step is to acknowledge that you are suffering from something that you know isn’t normal and seek help. Anxiety typically leads to depression, and depression can lead to more serious mental health illnesses. I am an advocate for therapy and I believe in its power so much that in the latest episode on the podcast, I spoke with a Licensed Professional Counselor to give an introduction to therapy and its benefits. You can check it out here.
However, if you already know what therapy is and you are ready to jump in. Check out BetterHelp ! They can match you with a therapist within 24 hours and you can chat with them via phone, video, or text, no matter where you are in the world.
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As always, take what you need from this and leave the rest but I want to hear from you. What’s one thing you will work on to increase your productivity?